So..last night I had what I thought was a jaw-dropping convo with a close friend of mine. She is very conservative. More so than I am, I find. It all started this way. The other day, we were hanging out. And over came a friend of hers who very obviously liked her. A few days later, I find out that they're second cousins....

I was creeped out. She doesn't like him, but I was still disgusted. We went on to have a mini argument/debate about it. And she said, that since they weren't really blood relatives, it was fine. To which I retorted, "So it's fine for step siblings to like each other..." (I thought I had her there lol)
Of course, she responded, "Well, in certain situations no, but yeah it'd be fine."

*mouth agape* I had no idea how to respond.

I posed the question to Var last night and she gave me her take. I wanted everyone elses. Second cousins liking each other? Eww or ok? Step-siblings? Is it gross, immoral, unethical...or is it fine and dandy? Thoughts in general....

It could just be that I'm latin and my culture is different. But the very thought of liking my second cousin fills me with horror.

Second cousins...it seems odd to me, but I don't think it's wrong.

Step-siblings, on the other hand...there may be no blood relation, but it feels wrong to me. And I just did a search in the Bible, and found Leviticus 18:11. It seems pertinent. :)

Except Lev 18:11 is referring to blood relations still--"begotten of thy father", so it's not the same as a sibling only related through marriage, which Leviticus never addresses (and wouldn't, as I can't think of any situation in that society in which step-siblings would even exist).

(My take on it, if anyone's curious, is that there are very rare situations in which I don't think I'd be bothered by it--i.e. the kids were not raised as sibs, their parents got married when they were already teenagers or older, and they either had an existing friendship/relationship before becoming stepsibs or they were just old enough to never think of each other as siblings. If they're raised as siblings? I don't care whether they're blood-related or not, that's gross. And obviously if there's a huge age difference or any abuse involved, that's gross too.)

Levitico 18:11 is talking about half siblings I believe, so it doesn't apply.

I kind of ditto vareth. sort of.

In the case of second cousins, I do not think it's unethical. It's legal, it isn't prohibited in the Bible, etc... Depending on the circumstances, it might be strange. I have a few second cousins my age, and I can't imagine being romantically involved with them. On the other hand, I know that I DID have a huge crush on one of them when I was younger.

re: stepkids

I don't think this is evil either. It isn't illegal, and as far as I know the Bible doesn't call it incest. You're completely unrelated. However, (and especially if they've been raised together as siblings) it strikes me as creepy, but again, my opinion doesn't dictate other people.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Frodo: I can't do this, Sam.

Sam: I know. It's all wrong. By rights we shouldn't even be here. But we are. It's like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn't. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something.

Frodo: What are we holding onto, Sam?

Sam: That there's some good in this world, Mr. Frodo... and it's worth fighting for.

We have different translations, Var. Mine said "brought up in your father's family" and I didn't take that to mean there was a blood connection. I could see it be half-sibling, though, so whatever.

I thought that you were blood related to your second cousins. Have I been using the term for the wrong people, or what? *confused*

i think its fine if your not related by blood. i mean the only reason (aside from biblical ones) for not breeding with your sibs is because of inbreeding problems right?

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That which does not feel pain is dead.

@Isi: You are blood-related to your second cousins, it's just getting thin at that point. I think second cousins are the children of your parents' first cousins.



Edited 1 times. Last edit at 01/13/10 06:00PM by Falchion.

Shalista Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> i think its fine if your not related by blood. i
> mean the only reason (aside from biblical ones)
> for not breeding with your sibs is because of
> inbreeding problems right?
>


lol. i hate term 'breeding.' it makes us sound like dogs.:P

but biologically speaking, yes.

Second cousins are also the children of your first cousins :D

Funny stuff, actually. We've been talking about this in biliogy recently (we're doing a unit on genetic right now) so this question has come up for me lately. This is mostly because we have to a response on an article entitled Go Ahead, Kiss Your Cousin and it does raise some rather interesting point.

Such as, up to 80% of marriages in all of history have been between first cousins or closer. Or at least, that's their approximation, mostly due to the fact that for many years you would marry someone within five miles or so of where you lived (however for you could walk and back in your day off).

Oh, and just to put something in perspective. Even with your first cousins, you share under 50% of the same DNA as them. It really doens't raise the chances of birth defect or any such thing very significantly, if you want to look at it from that point of view.

But since we're talking mostly ethically here and such, I suppose I'll have to talk about that. I mean, I really don't know if I'd want to marry any of my cousins, first or second, but I think that's more personal than anything. I know all of my cousins, and I just wouldn't really want to marry them. (Not to mention the closest one to my age is about 5 or 6 years my junior, and I haven't actually seen him since we were pretty little :P)

So yeah, though I wouldn't do it personally, I don't really see that much of a problem with it among second cousins and such. First cousins might be a bit odd, but it really depends on how you were raised. Though, thinking about it, half siblings don't really share much more DNA with you than your first cousins (it's still under 50%).

Anyways, I ramble :D