The ongoing Outtake
Posted by: The Traveler
Date: October 11, 2007 05:00PM
For the past month or so, we have been jointly writing a funny BotB fanfic called and Outtake. It's gotten long enough that I though we could let the other thread maybe drop for a while and just so that here. I'll go ahead and post what we have so far, and add something at the bottom. Here goes!
The Traveler, the OtherWorlder, the Person of What Seems to be Complete Randomness, was stuck. Normally, this would have been fairly ok, because she could call for help or something. But normally, Trav didn't have a giant tiger breathing on her nose and several bows, swords and other sundry weaponry pointing at her face.
"Who are you, and what are you doing here?" Demanded one of the men with a blade
"Uhh," I stammered "Would you mind helping me out of here before I answer that? This tree seems to have decided that I was for supper." The weak attempt at a joke drew no response, but one of the other men did pull me off the limb I had foolishly tried to slide down.
Frodo, an amateur Outtaking Traveler, watched as the odd girl was taken down from the tree. She laughed at the girl's words, forgetting that she was supposed to be hiding. "Sounds like you've been reading Lord of the Rings." Twenty heads swiveled in Frodo's direction, accompanied by twenty corresponding weapons. She took a step back and held up her hands. "Ummm, you know, Lord of the Rings? Man-eating trees? Sounds like Old Man Willow to me." Frodo chuckled nervously.
Traveler cast a mock-haughty look at Frodo. "Yeah, you should talk. You stole your name from poor old Tolkien. And nothing of the sort was on my mind."
A man with deep scars on his face looked back at his friend, who still had a grip on Trav's arm.
"They don't look armed." He said. "I think you can let go, Rulalin."
Trav shook her hand away from the man with distaste "Rulalin, huh?" then she added under her breath "Traitor."
Fortunately, he didn't hear her. As the various people carrying weapons began sheathing them, Frodo came nearer.
Trav spoke up again "So, you guys on your way to Sulare?"
Ciao peeked out from the bushes that concealed her from the group.
Frodo tossed her hair. "I didn't steal anything from Tolkien." she snapped. "I'm just...borrowing the name for a while." She came closer to the group, skirting Rulalin distastefully as she did.
"YAHHH!!!" Frodo jumped ten feet in the air. "Woa....who are you?"
"I am Ciao, that's Ch-ow--get it right. I'm here because... because... uhhh... why am I here? ...oh, yes that's right, I laughed at something I was reading."
The Novaana (that's who they were, afer all) looked confused. "What is going on here?" a woman in a fashionable dress demanded "Where are all these beggers coming from?"
"Uh, Yo." Trav put in "I'm no begger, and I THINK that I know these guys. Sorta." She looked at the others for help "Right?"
"Of course I know them," Frodo said brightly. "That's Rulalin," she said, pointing, "and umm..." she trailed off. The Novaana looked at her with raised eyebrows. "Well, even when the writer is as good as L.B. descriptions of people can be totally different from what they look like in real life," she mumbled defensively.
Trav shook her head. "OK, for one thing, the one who just called me "begger" has got to be Mindarin. The dude with the scars is obviously Aljeron, and the only one who had a bow is Joriam. The rediculouslu identical giants over there are Padraal and Pardaan - though don't ask me which is which - and the lovely lass with black hair is Wylla. Other than that, I'm not sure. But what I was actually asking was if I knew YOU." she pointed at Frodo and Ciao.
Frodo blushed bright purple and muttered something into her sleeve. "Well," she began slowly, "Although I can't say I know you, we're certainly closer in age and cultural backround than pretty much everyone else here, so I guess we sorta "know" each other. Good enough?"
Trav smiled "Sure." she siad. "Now that we're all here, can you answer my question, you Novaana types? Where are you headed? If it's to Sulare, we want to come too."
"If it's anywhere I want to come. There is no way I'm passing up an oppurtunity to travel with my favorite band of heroes." She grinned at the Novaana, who just stared. "Uhh, never mind."
Aljeron patted Koshti's head and sighed. "Well, I suppose we can't just leave you out here alone." the others nodded - some more reluctantly than others "You can ride double with us."
To her dissapointment, Trav was stuck with Mindarin while Ciao and Frodo rode with more friendly Personages.
It was a long ride.
Later that night, when they had finally stopped, and were sitting around a campfire after dinner, Trav spoke quietly with Frodo and Ciao "So, how did you guys get here?" she asked, poking a stick at the dying flames.
Her friends looked at each other "How do you mean?" asked Frodo
"Well, I have a stone that Elrond gave me in Middle Earth that lets me travele into other worlds. Some people have Dorwaes, like Lucy's Wardrobe. What about you?" She lowered her voice suddenly in reverence "Hey, niether of you are Naturals, are you?"
This time it was Ciao who said "Are we what?"
Trav looked relieved "You know, Naturals. There are a few people out there - one statistic in "Wanderer's Magazine" said about one every five generations - who don't need Dorwaes or stones or anything. They just - SNAP!" Trav snapped her fingers "Blink into other worlds like that. I'd love to meet one." She sighed "Heck, I'd love to BE one!"
Ciao shrugged and wrote her name on a stone with the end of a charred stick. "I'm nothing special like that, I was just reading a book and I ended up here. Until I realized I was in another place I thought the author was super talented...."
Frodo gave Trav a weird look. "I have no idea what your'e talking about...and I wasn't even reading the book when Poof! I'm here! Maybe it was that broccoli soup I had this morning..."
Trav nodded at Frodo. "It was like that when I fell into Middle Earth - you know, POOF and...hold on. Did you just say you had BROCCOLI soup for breakfast?"
She made a face. "I've never heard of that before. I had a friend once who would eat a cheese sandwich for breakfast, and then would be hyper all day...but..." Trav shook her head "That's just odd."
Frodo grinned. "It's good. Trust me. Except it does weird things to me...occasionaly. But then, so does the brussel sprouts dipped in chocolate..."
Ciao laughed. "What's wrong with cheese sandwhiches for breakfast? I it that all the time. I know someone who made bacon for breakfast and with all the fat left in the pan he couldn't pass up cooking a few hot dogs too."
Trav shook her head in mock dispair. "What IS the world coming to?" She laughed.
Just then, Aljeron stood up. "I believe you three owe us an explanation." He said.
"What do you mean?" Frodo asked innocently, trying out her sweetest smile on him. Unfortunately, she had forgotten that she still had braces. Aljeron's eyes widened. "What are those....those...things on your teeth?!" Frodo blushed and immediatly shut her mouth. "Nufink," she muttered, trying to keep her mouth closed.
Traveler nudged her. "Don't be embarresed. I'm sure there are peeps around here who need braces, maybe you could show them a thing or two." She faced Aljeron and the rest. "Sure, we'll explain things. It's like this - in our world, you people are imaginary, and we wanted to meet you. So here we are. Oh, and we know what happens to you guys in the future."
Valzaan - who had hardly said anything 'till now, peered at her with his milky eyes. "You are Prophets?"
Ciao turned her head toward Valzaan. "Well, no, at least I'm not, we've just read stories of you guys, so we know what's going to happen to who and stuff." She resisted giving Joriem a sympathetic look.
Ezra couldn't resist,"Hey,Joraiem you'll die if you don't watch out for Rulalin." Seeing the wierd glimpses given him,Ezra adds qoickly"I'm not a prophet either."
A tall girl in a white robe strode up. "Welcome. I am Galadriel. Listen to Ezra, Joriaem. Watch out for Rulalin. He will change the course of history if not stopped."
Trav jumped up and waved her hands wildly "Hush guys!!! You're the ones who are going to change history! I like Jorry and all, but we can't change the story!"
She looked around at the stares of the Novaana, and sat down quickly. "Sorry." She muttered.
Ciao glanced around at the uncomfortable stares. "So... um, what's up?"
Galadriel retorted firmly, "You're right, we can't! But we can still have fun trying. Leave if you want!"
Ciao's eyes shift from one person to the next.
"What are you talking about?" Aljeron raised a questioning brow. "You are bringing accusations against an innocent man."
"He's a lout so it's all cool." Ezra chimed in.
Frodo nodded. "Yea, what they said. He...." she trailed off as Rulalin strode up. His hand was on his sword hilt. "I suggest you hold your tongue, girl." He growled, his eyes dark. Frodo shrank back and let out a nervous laugh. "Hey, nothing meant by it Ru. After all, it's not all your fault."
"What's not his fault?" Ezra replied sticking his tongue out at Rulalin.
Frodo glared at Ezra. "I didn't mean it wasn't his fault, it just wasn't all his fault. After all, Synoki kind of convinced him to do it. It says that in the second book. Remember?"
JOraiem said,"What books? Books of prophecy?"
Ezra returned Frodo's glare"The devil made me do it is a cop out and a lie. To quote Sara Groves."
Mindarin chimed in,"Who's Sara?"
"Um, she's... Sara... Groves...?" The hostility in the air made Ciao uneasy.
Frodo let out a groan. "Look, I didn't say it wasn't his fault, and they're not books of prophecy, and I don't KNOW WHO SARA GROVES IS!" The last part came out as a shout. She subsided, blushing, as the silence and stares were all directed her way. "Look," she muttered to Ezra, "Rulalin is terrible and I hate what he did, but I was just trying to placate him. I mean, he'll kill us if we're not careful!"
Valzaan stood up, leaning on his staff. "I think I should have a talk with these strangers," he said calmly. "If the rest of you would leave us alone for a bit."
Everyone slowly drifted away. Rulalin was the last to leave, but he finally strode off with a parting glare.
Ciao watched the others leave and watched to see what Valzaan would do.
Galadriel was the first to speak. "Much as it may appear otherwise, we are not crazy. We just have...issues. Including an aversion to murder! And Frodo, just because Synoki tempted him doesn't excuse him. Rulalin admits that in the third book."
Valzaan shook his head. "Do you realize that what you just said underscores your sanity?"
Galadriel pursed her lips. "Sanity is in the eye of the beholder."
"Yeah like I'm sane and your nuts." Ezra pauses."Oh."*melts into obscurity*
Frodo rolled her eyes, exasperated. "I told you, I was just trying to placate Rulalin. Did you see the look in his eye? And isn't it beauty is in the eye of the beholder?" She raised an eyebrow.
Valzaan leaned forward. "Why do you keep saying these things about Rulalin?"
"Dude you're not much of prophet." Ezra looked around at the dumbstruck faces of his friends."Sorry."
Galadriel shook her head. "Like we'd be any better in our own world? We know this stuff cause this isn't our world. "
"What?" Valzaan wrinkled his brow. "Do you come from the stars?"
"No. But the advantages of this world are many. There's no insane aslums, padded cells, or pyscoanalysts here. If they think you're mad, they don't really do anything about it--lucky for us."
EB looks around and cries" where are we I think I have lost my memory"
Valzaan snapped his finger and said "Some one tell her where we were"
Galadriel shook her head. 'Valzaan had sent everyone else away."
"And now, we're sitting around talking and getting nowhere." Sighed Ciao
"Valzaan, were you going to say something," Galadriel prodds.
Valzaan swept his sightless over the group of travelers. "I know not why Allfather has brought you to us, but he has done so. So, I will invite you to travel with us, but I do ask that you not stir up any more trouble with your... prophicies...."
OK, so I didn't add anything, but I have to go. Have fun!